Approximate time reading this post: 4 minutes
For some reason I am convinced that I have had a fairly decent week. Which is weird to think because it was a complete roller coaster. From failing my math midterm, getting to actually spend time with ALL of my wonderful best friends, driving in the ridiculous rain fearing for my life, purchasing my favorite fall perfume, to absolutely disliking where the change in my life is taking me. One thing you will begin to notice about me is that I love consistency but the feelings are not mutual.
For the past month I have really started to question going on to a university, journalism, my new job decision, and everything else under the sun. And of course I am worrying about all of these matters because they are brand new right now or coming to a close very, very soon. I will warn you right now that I despise change. It is 1000% my worst enemy, besides consistency. But if I am not able to look forward, how do I expect to move at all? I may like who I am and who I have become but I wouldn’t want to stay positioned in this exact spot of my life for the rest of my existence.
In order to live a content and happy life I must allow my world to change and I must allow myself to change with it. I was really close to skipping my post today (I always write my HFM posts Sunday nights so whatever I feel I need to discuss or accomplish from the previous week I can do so in the next. Also it is my only open window of blogging time) because typing this right now is forcing myself to accept the change already and bringing me to a few personal realizations about my current state. And the last thing I want right now is to have someone say “I told you so” but at least it is coming from myself.
As any average millennial looking for answers, I turned to the internet and googled “dealing with change” where I came across this article from the Washington Post called “3 Ideas to Accept Change”. The author, Kali Hawlk, nailed it on the head with her statement that “we would often rather be unfulfilled and not quite happy in a situation we understand than trying a new, unknown path that provides the potential to find satisfaction and happiness. Don't settle for something solely because it's a known quantity.” I tend to do just this and since realizing I have been working on changing.
It can be a good thing to awkwardly force yourself to speak up in class, introduce yourself to the most successful person in the room, or crack a smile when you feel like breaking down. Situations like these serve as opportunities to test your patience and how deep you actually are in fear, which may not be as treacherous as you thought after the first attempt.
In Hawlk’s article, she explained how as humans we are never quite finished with anything so there is always room to progress at any pace as long as you are doing so. She used a passage from "Time is a Powerful Force” by Dan Gilbert that goes a little something like this:
“Human beings are works in progress that mistakenly think they're finished. The person you are right now is as transient, as fleeting, and as temporary as all the people you've ever been. The one constant in our life is change.... The present is a psychological illusion. The present is just the wall between yesterday and today...if you go to the beach, you see water and you see sand and it looks like there's a line between them. But that line is not a third thing. There's only water, and there's only sand. Similarly, all moments in time are either in the past or in the future; which is to say, the present doesn't exist."
When I walk into the Student Life office at PVCC just about everyday my mentor and friend, Mike, tells me that I am completely different than the young adult he met two years ago and how he is thoroughly impressed by my growth. I agree and I see the change as well. The person I was two years ago would NEVER even think it remotely possible to follow through with my dreams in the way I am doing right now let alone even have a blog. Slowly but surely, I have been pushed to adapt. From the advice I gave in my previous post on “Irony and Conquering Stress in the Moment,” you can compare your current situation to one that you previously conquered that was equally if not more difficult when conquering stress and heavy life choices.
This is supposed to be the most exciting part of my young life, so I am going to start treating it that way. I will also take the last piece of advice from our guest author, Hawlk, “Enjoy the journey and appreciate that, every step of the way, you can be in a state of constant positive progress. You're always developing into the person you're meant to be.”
If you are currently conquering change or debating it right now I hope this helps you in any small way. Here’s hope for change and the future because the line between now and then is unimportant, so just make your move already.