Internalizing Your Failures

Insight: Approximate time reading this post: 4 minutes

As honest as my blog posts usually are, I would like this specific one to answer a few questions—not make excuses—and clear up my absence here on Mondays. I have had everyone and their mother (literally) ask about when my next blog post would be and this is a question I kind of despise answering. These few summer months have been different but friend-filled, transitionary, an experiment to see just how quick I can make decisions, and contained plenty of those five day work weeks. Don’t get me wrong, this in between community college and a university experience has been wonderful but in the midst I encountered a fair share of personal matters I wasn’t ready to share quite yet. So here they are now.

For this brief moment in life, I had an interesting amount of change that could headline something like “Heartbreak,” “Finances,” “Time,” and “Who Are You Again?” As these personal details consumed me, I didn’t think they were “pretty” enough to expose to my readers. I still don’t think it is necessary to write out all the nitty gritty details, but I am acknowledging right now that I am your typical human with my own human issues. In the meantime, I lacked to post on HFM (obviously) and started to internalize the failure of being inconsistent.

As much as I love writing and the realizations that seem to come with it, it's important to take a break from the things you love. That way you don't start to hate them over time when partaking too much; I find moderation increasingly important. I started to dread Mondays because that meant I had to crank out an uncertain blog post and sometimes when I didn't it felt like a failure. That is actually the complete opposite purpose of my blog, so how can I tell people to have hope and love for Mondays when I myself started to dread them just as much? This realization started to speak for itself when I read a quote by French poet and novelist, Guillame Apollinaire, “Now and then it’s good to pause in our pursuit of happiness and just be happy.” In this pursuit, I do apologize for taking too long of a blogging hiatus, but I will not apologize for taking a hiatus in the first place.

An interesting friend I met through the Business of Fashion club at ASU, Audree Lopez, recently posted on her blog “Simply Audree Kate” (click her blog name to reach the link) about creating and recreating her identity in a lifestyle that she was constantly told she should feel “lucky” for. Her post today really gave me the little push I needed to start being honest and just talk about this already. I applaud her courage to reveal that the life one leads on social media is only about 40% of what is actually happening behind our glowing screens. This became a recurring theme this summer as I watched friends engage in internships 10,000 miles away or other AZ Instagrammers express that what you see is never quite the same sight of being in front of the camera.

So now I would like this to be the last time that I blog about why I'm not blogging. I can now feel comfortable with my goal of posting on HFM when I can and when I want to. Also, for the reason that my readers and I have an understanding that even when I'm not posting on Mondays that doesn't mean I have given up on the beginning of the week. But sometimes it takes time to get your thoughts together. I want a quality blog and if I keep forcing myself to write it won’t be. I hope this bit of honesty was refreshing and that you had an excellent Monday. Feel free to click the links below for some articles, songs, and other tidbits of life I am currently enjoying.

Neat things to click: